Cast: Reporter, Editor, toy gun

Setting: Newsroom

Editor: Okay, you're new on the job, so I'll give you a tip. You have to go and get a current story.

Something new.

Reporter: Right, boss. Great news.

Goes out, comes running back in.

Reporter: Boss! Boss! Two weeks ago John Doe died falling into a manhole!

Editor: That's old news. I told you, something more recent.

Reporter: Fine, boss. Something newer.

Goes out, comes running back in.

Reporter: Boss! Boss! A week ago there was fire downtown!

Editor: (A little annoyed.) That's still old news. Something even more recent.

Goes out, comes running back in.

Reporter: Boss! Boss! A car wreck two days ago!

Editor: (Annoyed) No good! Too old! Something new! That's why they call it news!

Goes out, comes running back in.

Reporter: Boss! Boss! Editor of a major newspaper got shot today!

Editor: (Interested) Oh really? Who?

Reporter: You! (Shoots him with toy gun, and the editor falls to the ground.)